The 3 Ways to Stay Motivated (And Why Most People Only Use One)

The Problem We All Face

Most new year goals fail by February.

You know this pattern, don't you? Someone decides they're going to get fit, lose weight, build a business, write a book. They're full of energy and determination. They join the gym. They buy the equipment. They make the plans.

And then, a few weeks later, it all fades away.

Why does this happen?

After 30+ years of helping coaches, consultants, and business owners achieve their goals, and after interviewing 172 successful people, I've found there's a specific reason most people fail to follow through on their ambitions.

It's not lack of willpower. It's not that they don't care enough. It's not even that the goal wasn't important to them.

The problem is simpler than that. Most people are only using ONE type of motivation. And that type runs out.

Let me explain what I mean.

The Mistake That Kills Your Goals

There are three types of motivation. Most people only use the first one. And that's why they fail.

Over the course of all my research into what makes successful people different from those who struggle, I've identified these three distinct ways human beings motivate themselves to take action.

Here's what's interesting: away motivation is what most people rely on. And it's also the one that inevitably runs out. That's the mistake right there.

Let me walk you through each type so you can see exactly what I mean.

Way 1: Away Motivation - The Catalyst for Action

This is the motivation that gets you started.

It's when you're trying to move away from a problem. You don't want to be overweight. You don't want to be unfit. You don't want to be broke. You don't want to feel the way you're feeling right now.

Those types of feelings are triggered when something happens. You run upstairs and find yourself gasping for breath at the top. You look in the mirror and think, "I'd like to be a different shape." You check your bank balance and realise you need more money.

This away motivation kicks in. And here's the expression I wrote many years ago for this:

"Away motivation is the catalyst for action."

And it is so true. Away motivation gets you moving. It's powerful. It's immediate. It creates urgency.

However, and here comes the problem, it is only the catalyst for action. It is not the continuation of action.

That's towards motivation, which I'll get to in a moment.

Why Away Motivation Always Runs Out

Let me give you an example you'll recognise immediately.

Somebody joins the gym. They're determined to be fitter, slimmer, stronger, whatever it might be. Away motivation got them to join the gym in the first place. Maybe it was body shape, fitness levels, whatever it might have been.

Come mid-February, they stop going.

This is common practice. Why?

Well, this is why. As that person gets a little bit slimmer, a little bit fitter, a little bit healthier, whatever it might be that they're wanting to get away from, as they get towards it, the away motivation runs out.

Which is why it's only ever the catalyst for action.

Think about it this way. Let's say somebody wants a particular level of fitness, and they want to be fitter. In fact, what drove them was the fact that they didn't want to feel unfit.

They get a little bit fitter, and suddenly they're feeling better. So this away motivation has stopped working.

Here's an analogy that makes this crystal clear:

Imagine a big block of ice. You're stood next to it. You're cold. You move away from the ice. Now you're not quite so cold. It doesn't affect you as much anymore. The further you move away from the ice, the less cold you become.

And this is the biggest challenge.

So many people live their lives stuck in what's called the comfort zone. And I can't think of anything less comfortable.

The Comfort Zone Trap

The way people live their life in the comfort zone is like this. Everything is away motivated.

They don't want to be too fit, but they don't want to be too unfit. They don't want to be too wealthy, but they don't want to be too poor. They don't want, they don't want, they don't want to be all these things.

It's always away motivated. And of course, it keeps running out.

That's why they're unhappy.

The comfort zone isn't comfortable at all. It's a constant cycle of moving slightly away from discomfort, then drifting back, then moving away again. Never actually getting anywhere.

Here's How We Get Around the Mistake

You've heard it a hundred, a thousand times from me, from loads of people: we've got to have goals.

Why?

Because towards motivation is the continuation of action.

Away motivation gets us started. Towards motivation keeps us going.

Let's go back to our person who has joined the gym. They joined in January. They've got some goals to be not something. They stop not being it, so of course the motivation stops.

But if they now set a goal to be, do, or have something, you know, it's always be, do, have, isn't it? be this type of person, do this type of thing, have this type of result, that's what keeps them going because they're constantly moving towards the goal.

Way 2: Towards Motivation - The Continuation of Action

I've often described it like this.

Imagine the block of ice I talked about earlier is at one end of a long room, and we move away from it. That's away motivation.

But over at the other end of the room, there's a friend of mine. He's got a glass of something I like drinking, whether it's tea, whether it's alcohol, who knows what. He's got a great joke to tell me, and he's a great joke teller. And there's a fire at that end of the room.

As I move towards him, this friend of mine—and I can think of the person it is—then I'm motivated to keep going to get even closer to get the warmth of the fire that's at that end, to get the friendship, to get the joke, to get the drink.

That's towards motivation.

Away motivation is the catalyst for action. Towards motivation is the continuation of action.

Clear, isn't it?

So when you set a goal, you're not just trying to get away from where you are. You're moving towards something specific. Something you actually want.

• "I will run a 5K by June."
• "I will save £10,000 this year."
• "I will write my book in 90 days."

These are towards goals. They pull you forward. And the closer you get, the MORE motivated you become. Not less.

Way 3: Reflex and Habit - The Game Changer

Now, number three. This is a powerful one. A really, really powerful one.

The third reason human beings take action is this: reflex.

You know if you get something caught in your throat, you'll cough it up. If something upsets your stomach, you'll be sick. If you get dust in your nose, you'll sneeze. If you see a tree falling, you'll jump back.

It's a reflex.

Now, I looked up the word reflex because I was really interested in the connection between the word reflex and another word. And I wanted to make sure that link was right. The word that I had in my mind to go with reflex was habit.

And this is what it said in the dictionary. I wrote it down here. It said:

"Reflex is any automatic, unthinking, often habitual behavior or response."

That's the key to this idea of motivation: to make it a habit.

For example, at the start of every day, I write a journal. It's triggered in my mind now. It's got an anchor. It's a habit.

So I sit at my table, which is where I am at the moment. And on my left-hand side here, on a side table, is my journal. So I automatically reach for it.

In a cupboard just underneath is my 1-31 tickler file. In times gone by, I reach for that and check for the day. These days I do it electronically. All of these things are habitual.

I know people who are early morning runners and walkers who have told me that they lay out their clothes at the side of the bed so that when they wake up in the morning and they look out of bed, whichever side they happen to be on, there are their exercising clothes ready to put on.

It becomes habit.

So if you can create for yourself the habit of the actions that you need to take in order to achieve the goals that you've set, the aspirations that you have, fantastic.

This is what can keep you going on and on.

Making It Automatic

Now, I know it's easy for me because I'm task-oriented. If I look at my DISC profile, I'm a high DI, and that high D part of me means that I like tasks. I'm very comfortable doing tasks and doing that stuff that needs to be done.

Very high I people sometimes, and high S people, aren't like that.

But if we can make it a habit, if we can make it a reflex that we do these things, then we can have all the motivations working for us.

We can have away motivation getting us into action. We can have towards motivation keeping us going towards the action. And we can take the activities that make us achieve the end result by making sure it becomes habit, a reflex, so we are anchored to whatever it happens to be.

A situation. A person. Whatever you decide it is to be that gets you to take that action on a regular basis so that you take the steps to achieve the goal.

After all, as you and I know, we cannot take responsibility for our results. There are too many variables. We can take responsibility for our actions because there aren't.

Putting It All Together

So here's how it all works together.

The 3 ways to stay motivated:

1. Away Motivation = Gets you started

Use this to create the initial spark. Identify what you don't want anymore. What's the problem you're moving away from? This creates urgency and gets you into action.

2. Towards Motivation = Keeps you going

Set a specific goal. Not "I don't want to be unfit" but "I will run a 5K in under 30 minutes by June 15th." This pulls you forward. The closer you get, the stronger the pull becomes.

3. Reflex/Habit = Makes it automatic

Create triggers. Anchors. Automatic behaviors that don't require willpower.

• Put your gym clothes by the bed.
• Journal at the same desk at the same time every morning.
• Make your action the first thing you do, not the thing you fit in later.

When it's a habit, when it's a reflex, you don't have to think about it. You don't have to motivate yourself. You just do it.

That's when success becomes almost, almost assured.

Why This Matters for You

If you're a coach, a consultant, a business owner, or someone who's trying to achieve something significant in your life, understanding these three types of motivation changes everything.

Most people are stuck using only away motivation. They're in the comfort zone. They get uncomfortable, move away from the discomfort, then drift back. Over and over.

But when you understand all three types, you can design your goals and your actions to work with human psychology instead of against it.

You can:

• Use away motivation to get started
• Set towards goals to keep yourself moving forward
• Build habits that make success automatic

Your Next Steps

Here's what I want you to do right now.

Think about a goal you have. Maybe it's something you've been trying to achieve for a while. Maybe it's something you've failed at before.

Now ask yourself these three questions:

1. What am I moving AWAY from?

What's the problem? What's the discomfort? What don't you want anymore? Use this to get yourself into action.

2. What am I moving TOWARDS?

What's the specific goal? Not what you don't want, but what you DO want. Make it specific. Make it measurable. Give it a deadline.

3. What HABIT can I create to make this automatic?

What trigger can you set up? What routine can you establish? What can you do every day at the same time, in the same place, that moves you towards your goal without requiring willpower?

When you have all three working together, you'll find that staying motivated becomes easier than you ever thought possible.

Because you're not relying on willpower anymore. You're not hoping you'll feel like it. You're using the three types of motivation the way successful people use them.

And that makes all the difference.

Want More Support?

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I look forward to seeing you there.

About Peter Thomson

Peter Thomson is the UK's Most Prolific Business Development Author and has spent over 30+ years helping coaches, consultants, and business owners achieve their goals. After selling his business and interviewing 172 successful people, Peter has dedicated his career to sharing the strategies and insights that separate high achievers from those who struggle. Through his books, training programs, and The Achievers Club, Peter has helped thousands of professionals create businesses and lives of choice.