The Art of Reading People: Body Language Secrets for Successful Communication

When I'm teaching my advanced business courses, one thing never fails to surprise participants: they've been missing up to 93% of communication for their entire lives.

That's right—if you're only listening to someone's words, you're catching a mere fraction of what they're truly saying.

I've spent decades observing thousands of business interactions, and I can tell you that mastering the art of reading body language is perhaps the most powerful skill you can develop for business success. It's like having a superpower that lets you peer beyond words to understand what people are really thinking and feeling.

Whether you're in a sales conversation, a negotiation, managing staff, or simply trying to build better relationships with colleagues, the ability to accurately read and interpret non-verbal cues gives you a tremendous advantage. And unlike what many people believe, this isn't about manipulating others—it's about building genuine understanding.

In this article, I'll share some of the most powerful techniques I teach in my Persuasion Formula course, helping you become more attuned to the silent signals that make up the majority of human communication. Let's dive in.

Why Body Language Matters in Communication

Communication is far more than just an exchange of words. When we interact with others, we're constantly sending and receiving signals on multiple channels simultaneously.

Consider these facts:

•  Research shows that people form first impressions within 7 seconds of meeting someone
•  These impressions are based primarily on non-verbal cues
•  Many business deals are won or lost before a single word is spoken
•  Trust is established largely through non-verbal consistency

I've consulted with countless business leaders who wonder why their teams don't respond to their directions or why prospective clients don't convert despite "perfect pitches." In almost every case, the disconnect lies in what's not being said.

Body language serves several critical functions in communication:

•  Reinforcement: Non-verbal cues can strengthen verbal messages
•  Contradiction: Body language often reveals when someone's words don't match their true feelings
•  Substitution: Sometimes, gestures and expressions communicate more effectively than words
•  Regulation: Non-verbal signals help control conversation flow
•  Emotional expression: Body language reveals feelings that might otherwise remain hidden

The 7/38/55 Rule of Communication

One of the most cited studies in communication research comes from Dr. Albert Mehrabian, who developed what's known as the 7/38/55 rule. His findings suggest that in face-to-face communications:

•  7% of meaning comes from the actual words spoken
•  38% derives from tone of voice and how the words are delivered
•  55% comes from body language and facial expressions

While these exact percentages may vary depending on context, the principle remains profoundly important: non-verbal communication dominates our understanding of interactions.

I've seen this principle in action countless times. In one memorable instance, I was coaching a business owner who couldn't understand why his sales team wasn't performing despite his clear instructions. When I observed him in action, the issue became immediately apparent—while his words expressed confidence in his team, his crossed arms, lack of eye contact, and stiff posture broadcast distrust and disapproval. His team wasn't responding to his words; they were responding to the much more powerful 93% of his communication.

Reading Facial Expressions

The face is perhaps our most expressive communication tool, capable of conveying thousands of subtle emotional states. Research by Dr. Paul Ekman identified seven universal facial expressions recognised across cultures:

1.  Happiness
2.  Sadness
3.  Fear
4.  Disgust
5.  Anger
6.  Surprise
7.  Contempt

What makes facial expressions particularly valuable in business settings is that many expressions occur automatically and are difficult to fake. This gives you reliable insight into someone's authentic reactions.

But here's the crucial point many miss: facial expressions often happen in microseconds (what experts call "micro-expressions") before a person consciously controls their face. Learning to spot these fleeting signals gives you tremendous insight into someone's genuine response.

For example, when presenting a proposal to a client, you might notice a quick flash of concern crossing their face when you mention the investment required, even if they maintain a polite smile. This tells you exactly what objection you'll need to address, even if they haven't voiced it yet.

The Lacrimal Caruncle: Your Secret Weapon

Among the most subtle yet revealing facial indicators is what I call the "truth detector" of the face: the lacrimal caruncle. This is the small red part in the inner corner of the eye near the nose.

When someone is truly engaged and receptive to what you're saying, this small area remains visible. However, when they feel discomfort, concern, or disagreement, the lower eyelid moves slightly toward the nose and upward, causing the caruncle to disappear.

This tiny signal has saved me from countless business missteps. Here's how to use this information effectively:

•  When you notice the caruncle disappear during your presentation or conversation, it's a signal to pause and create space for the person to voice their concerns
•  Rather than directly pointing out what you've observed (which can make people uncomfortable), simply say, "I sense you might have some thoughts about this—I'd love to hear your perspective"
•  Never push for agreement or a decision when the caruncle is hidden—it signals the person isn't ready

My golden rule: never seek a "yes" unless the caruncle is visible, as it indicates genuine openness and agreement.

Decoding Hand Gestures

After the face, hands are perhaps our most expressive body parts. In business contexts, hand gestures can reveal confidence, uncertainty, openness, defensiveness, and much more.

Some key hand gestures to watch for include:

•  Steepled fingers: Often indicates confidence and authority. When someone brings their fingertips together in a steeple formation, they're typically feeling self-assured about their position.
•  Palm displays: Open palms suggest honesty and openness, while hidden palms might indicate concealment or uncertainty. When someone turns their palms down, they're often taking a firm position.
•  Self-touching: Touching the face, neck, or adjusting clothing frequently signals discomfort or anxiety. Watch for someone touching their neck, which often indicates stress or disagreement.
•  Thumb displays: When the thumbs are visible (like in pockets with thumbs out), it generally indicates confidence. Hidden thumbs might suggest insecurity.

I once observed a negotiation where one party kept his hands below the table throughout the discussion. Despite his confident words, this concealment signalled discomfort that helped us identify he was operating beyond his authority. This observation allowed us to suggest involving additional decision-makers, ultimately saving weeks of wasted time.

Posture and What It Reveals

The way someone sits or stands tells you volumes about their internal state, status perceptions, and level of engagement.

Key posture indicators include:

•  Leaning: Leaning toward you typically signals interest and engagement. Leaning back might indicate discomfort or creating psychological distance.
•  Openness vs. closure: Open posture (uncrossed arms and legs) suggests receptivity, while closed posture (crossed arms or legs) often indicates defensiveness or disagreement.
•  Height and space: Taking up more space physically (spreading out papers, extending arms along chair backs) signals confidence and perceived authority.
•  Alignment: Whether someone's shoulders and feet are aligned toward you or angled away reveals if they're fully engaged or looking for an exit.

I worked with one business leader who couldn't understand why his team seemed resistant during meetings despite their verbal agreement. When we analysed a recorded meeting, the pattern became clear—every time he introduced a new initiative, his team members subtly shifted their posture away from him while verbally agreeing. Their bodies were telling the truth their words weren't.

Proxemics: The Power of Space

How people use physical space—both their own and in relation to others—provides important clues about comfort, interest, and perceived status. Anthropologist Edward T. Hall identified four distance zones in Western cultures:

1.  Intimate distance (0-18 inches): Reserved for close relationships
2.  Personal distance (18 inches - 4 feet): Typical for friends and informal business interactions
3.  Social distance (4-12 feet): Standard for most business dealings
4.  Public distance (12+ feet): Used for public speaking and formal situations

In business settings, violations of expected distance norms can create discomfort that undermines your communication. I've seen countless deals derailed when someone unconsciously invaded another's personal space, creating discomfort the person couldn't quite articulate but definitely felt.

Pay attention to these spatial cues:

•  If someone consistently backs away during your conversation, you may be standing too close
•  When someone invites you to move from across a desk to sitting side-by-side, they're often signalling increased trust and collaboration
•  Status is often marked by who controls the most space in a room

Mirroring and Rapport Building

One of the most powerful techniques in non-verbal communication is mirroring—subtly matching another person's body language to build rapport. This works because humans naturally mirror people they like and trust, so reverse-engineering this process can accelerate relationship-building.

Effective mirroring includes:

•  Adopting similar (not identical) posture
•  Matching energy levels and speaking pace
•  Using comparable gestures at a delay
•  Echoing breathing patterns

The key is subtlety—obvious mimicry feels manipulative and undermines trust. When done naturally, however, mirroring creates a sense of comfort and connection.

I once coached a sales team that was struggling to build rapport with a particular client demographic. By teaching them to gently mirror their prospects' communication styles and body language, we increased their conversion rate by 37% in just three months.

Voice Tone and Inflection

While strictly speaking not "body language," vocal delivery is a critical non-verbal element that works in concert with physical cues. Pay attention to:

•  Pitch: Higher pitch often signals excitement or stress, while lower pitch typically conveys confidence and authority
•  Pace: Speaking rate reveals emotional states and confidence levels
•  Volume: Changes in volume highlight what someone considers important
•  Hesitations: Pauses and fillers ("um," "ah") can indicate uncertainty or careful thought

I coached one business owner who couldn't understand why his team didn't take his feedback seriously despite his direct language. Recording his communications revealed the issue—his voice consistently went up in pitch at the end of statements, making directives sound like questions.

Cultural Differences in Body Language

A critical caveat to everything we've discussed is that body language varies significantly across cultures. What's considered appropriate eye contact in one culture might be disrespectful in another. Similarly, gestures that are positive in some regions can be highly offensive elsewhere.

Some important cross-cultural considerations:

•  In many Asian cultures, extended eye contact with superiors may be considered disrespectful
•  Personal space requirements vary dramatically between cultures
•  Head nodding doesn't always signal agreement in all regions
•  Hand gestures especially can have radically different meanings across cultures

If you do business internationally, it's essential to study the specific non-verbal norms of your target regions. I've seen too many promising business relationships damaged by unintentional non-verbal misunderstandings.

How to Use Body Language in Your Business

Now that we've covered the fundamentals of reading body language, let's look at practical applications for your business:

In Sales Conversations:

•  Watch for buying signals like increased eye contact, leaning forward, and nodding
•  Notice resistance signals such as crossed arms, leaning back, or looking at exits
•  Use the lacrimal caruncle to gauge genuine interest versus polite listening
•  Create comfortable space that facilitates trust-building

In Negotiations:

•  Establish baseline behaviours early to better detect shifts when discussing sensitive topics
•  Pay attention to inconsistencies between words and body language
•  Use mirroring techniques to build rapport before making critical points
•  Notice when someone touches their face after making an offer—it often signals they have flexibility they're not verbally expressing

In Leadership:

•  Ensure your non-verbal communication aligns with your verbal messages
•  Watch team members' body language during meetings to identify unspoken concerns
•  Use spatial arrangements to facilitate the type of interaction you want
•  Demonstrate engaged listening through your own body language

In Customer Service:

•  Train staff to recognise signs of customer dissatisfaction before verbal complaints
•  Use open posture and mirroring to quickly establish rapport
•  Maintain appropriate eye contact to signal full attention
•  Recognise cultural differences in your customer base

One business owner I worked with implemented a simple body language training programme for her customer service team. Within three months, customer satisfaction scores improved by 22%, and complaint escalations dropped by over 30%. The team wasn't offering different solutions—they were simply becoming better at reading and responding to customers' non-verbal cues.

Conclusion

Mastering the art of reading body language transforms your ability to communicate effectively in business. By paying attention to facial expressions, gestures, posture, proxemics, and vocal cues, you gain access to the 93% of communication that most people miss.

Remember that the goal of understanding body language isn't manipulation—it's creating genuine connection and understanding. When you can accurately read others' non-verbal signals, you can address concerns before they become objections, build trust more efficiently, and ensure your own messages are received as intended.

I've seen businesses transform their results simply by becoming more attuned to these silent signals. From sales teams that dramatically improve conversion rates to leaders who finally break through communication barriers with their teams, the impact of body language mastery cannot be overstated.

If you'd like to deepen your understanding of non-verbal communication and learn more powerful persuasion techniques, my comprehensive Persuasion Formula course covers these topics in depth, with practical exercises and real-world applications.

Learn more at peterthomson.com/the-persuasion-formula.

What body language signals have you noticed in your business interactions?

I'd love to hear your experiences in the comments below.

Peter

Peter Thomson

'The UK's Most Prolific Business Development Author'